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DeBlog: Postmortems

Don't miss our Eliminations Stage Match Reports on page 3.

July 12, 2006 - Recent Visitor Keywords

Our postmortem will be delayed a few days. Meanwhile and for your information, we present below a dozen of the most interesting keywords visitors used to find our site in the last 48 hours (with a brief comment on each):
  • - zidane headbutt video clip - most common
  • - zidane headbutts materazzi - second most common
  • - zidane headbutts italy - a tad overstated
  • - zenadine zidane head butt video - which do you want more?
  • - materazzi offended zidane - we can assume that
  • - zidane headbutts materazzi video game - it's not out yet
  • - i insulted zizou: materazzi - a creative searcher
  • - french headbutts italian world cup clip - read up on it first
  • - world cup 2006 spreadsheet - you're too late
  • - materazzi head shake kehl - let me consult my notes
  • - animated clips of zidane headbutt - tautology, unless you mean gifs
  • - worldcup 2005 results spreadsheet - lost in time
I think we just got an insight on what drives the tabloid press. Expect keychains soon, as well as a doll and 'Eau du Zizou.'

July 11, 2006 - Zidane Wins Golden Ball Award

zidane's headbutt
nd so the World Cup 2006 ends - not with a bang but with a head-butt. For all those arriving here by way of a google search for a video clip of the act, we've decided to award you an 'A' for persistence. Technically, it's not a headbutt you're looking for; it was a head-to-chest strike that the press prefer to call "a butt to the chest." That's somewhat unsatisfactory as no butts were involved apart from, perhaps, an involuntary spasm in the area. Whatever you call it, it's likely to become de rigeur in the banlieues of Paris, and in some obscure manner, could even lead to increased funding for banlieue modernization.

The clip is really not big a deal: ZZ bends forward and thrusts his head into Matzo's chest. The mystery lies in the provocation - the exchange of words that led to the act. According to the Italian new agency ANSA, Materazzi denied calling him a "dirty terrorist" with these words: "I'm ignorant. I don't even know what the word means."  It might have come from the anti-racism group SOS-Racisme, quoting "sources très bien informées dans le monde du football" - aka the ballboys. What's insane is this alleged Gattuso quote reported in Ansa's "Azzurri Out to Stop Zidane" piece: "The best way to defuse the Zidane danger would be to 'make the sign of the cross.'"  His colleagues, however, denied Zidane would get any special treatment.

ZZ decided to stay mum for a couple of days, according to his agent, before revealing the provocation. The BBC sought help from expert lip readers, and they reported Materazzi flashed the mother card - and this on the day that ZZ's mom was hospitalized! The Irish Times said Brazil's Globo showed the clip to three lip readers, who believe Materazzi said, "Tua sorella è una puttana."  Verbal jousts in the Mediterranean area typically escalate into mixing family with fecal and coital matters before becoming physical. It's all rather puerile. We decided to put it to a test ourselves by showing the clip to an agnostic, gay couple of deaf-mute Hollywood agents. They came up with this:
  • - So...you're going into showbiz, I heard.
  • - Yeah, wanna give me a leg up?
  • - Why not? What do you have in mind?
  • - I turn around and headbutt you.
  • - Ah...a publicity stunt! What about the match?
  • - You catch on quick. We're going to penalties anyway - everyone knows that's a lottery.
  • - Alright, but not my face, OK? I have a future to consider too.
  • - No problem. Just act surprised.
  • - I've always wanted to be an actor...how'd you know?
  • - You play football, don't you? OK, I'm turning around...
  • - Be gentle... Oooff!
Anyway, it's best forgotten quickly though the controversy is unlikely to fade away* (see rough translation of SOS-Racism's Communiqué at the bottom of this page). Zizou received strong praise from French President Chirac, and also garnered the most votes from journalists to earn the coveted adidas Golden Ball award for best player of the tournament. (Carvalho, who really put his silver bells on the line got nothing.) No doubt Zidane was the sentimental favourite. With a signed five-year contract as a football analyst for CANAL+ TV, the French can look forward to seeing more of their privacy-loving, discrimination-fighting, Algerian-born, chest-butting, French SuperStar. We wish him well.

Other Award Winners

* A rough translation of the SOS-Racism Communiqué:

Paris, July 10, 2006 - Zenadine Zidane called a "dirty terrorist" - SOS Racism demands a FIFA enquiry.

According to very well informed sources in football circles, it would seem that the Italian player Marco Materazzi called Zinedine Zidane a "dirty terrorist." If this hypothesis is confirmed, the Italian player made a racist remark - an attitude unfortunately present in current football that our association has been denouncing for many years.

Whereas the World Cup was held under a banner supporting the fight against racism, and whereas FIFA modified its rules in April of 2006 following racist remarks against Samuel Eto'o, we ask that FIFA stick to the letter of its declarations.

For this reason SOS Racism firmly demands that FIFA bring all matters of this altercation to light, and that sanctions provided for by the official regulations be applied if necessary.

SOS Racism will remain extremely vigilant as to the actions taken pertaining to this incident.